Love, the deadliest of all deadly things: It kills you both when you have it and when you don't.The first time I had a crush on a boy, I was in sixth grade.Not that the world started bursting with technicolor all of a sudden but *giggleblush* I kind of started looking forward to pass by his class and shoot sidelong (and not so subtle) glances at him (given my 12 year old excited delirious self and all that newly found stalkerish abilities). And I used to think he was the awesomest boy to ever walk the corridors of the school (Not exactly fabulous on the face front, but i could live with that). And when he smiled at me, I swear my tummy would do a somersault on a trampoline and my face would go so hot that it seemed like i had been standing in the sun for hours. Well sadly,he never found out that i was bonkers about him cos i never gathered up the courage to advance up to the fess up level.My friends saw all the symptoms- furious denial, the goofy grin plastered on my face nearly all the time, my new chameleon superpowers (face going from a mellow normal to a healthy tomato red to shameful beet red).Apparently, the fact that i was crushing was as clear as day but you know, being in like is so embarrassing for 12 year olds.So this is how amor deliria nervosa goes. You get this intense and the most beautiful feeling in the world: You are hopeful. That's a BIG STRONG WORD. It's so...so emotionally consuming.Magdalena is really looking forward to the procedure- it's a few more days away when she turns 18 and life without pain, heartbreak and emotional trauma that comes with it. She gets really wary when a boy starts to befriend her cos she's scared she might 'contract' love.“Why do you care?” I say, barely a whisper.“I told you,” he whispers back. I can feel his breath justtickling the space behind my ear, making the hair prick upon my neck. “I like you.”“You don’t know me,” I say quickly.“I want to, though.” But then again she's always looking forward to their meetings cos she's intrigued and let's just face it, a bit attracted.Even though Alex is only a yearolder than I am, we’re separated, irreparably and totally, bythe procedure. He might as well be my grandfather.It's really beautiful- the description of being in love, the surreal feeling that makes you float.And then there's what love can do to you. Daydreaming becomes your profession, the lying game, and your heart turns into an athlete running on sprints whenever his lips are on your skin. It's amazingly maddening.Gee, I wonder what took me this long to read this book when i had it pickling on shelf for almost a year.Anyhoo, i am glad i picked it.Better late than never, yeah?THEME SONG- OUTLAWS OF LOVE by ADAM LAMBERT♪♫♪Everywhere we go we're looking for the sunNowhere to grow old, we're always on the runThey say we'll rot in Hell, but I don't think we willThey've branded us enough Outlaws of Love.♪♫♪On second thought, this song tells about the taboo faced by gays everyday. But it fits just the same.Remember, GOD LOVES US EQUALLY.ps And Alex,I love you. Remember. They cannot take it.